i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Randomize
