I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
