His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
