Rock
Scissors
Fuck
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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