I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
