its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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