The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
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