in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
