Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
