i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
He shit in the fireplace
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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