I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Randomize