Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
