DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
