I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
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