The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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