If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
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