It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
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