Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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