i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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