is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
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