Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize