Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
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Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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