i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
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