I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize