I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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