I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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