Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
