Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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