She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
