the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
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