covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
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