Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
is that a dick in a sweater?
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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