My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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