I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
