That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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