I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
