Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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