Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
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