Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
