Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Randomize
