Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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