best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize