I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
