I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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