i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
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