his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
