Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
The air was thick with penises
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
