Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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