Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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