Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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